Our First Month As A Family Of Five

I have to say now looking back that the first 2 months were by far the hardest.  When we left the hospital they said we didn't have to see the doctor for 2 weeks, and that me solely breast feeding was fine.  So that is what we did, and I thought they were doing good.  We were getting a little bit of sleep, and just adjusting to each other.  When we did go in for the girls appointment, we were shocked to find out that they had kept on loosing weight and were not getting enough food.  Teagan was down to 4lbs 10 oz, and Peyton was down to 5 lbs 8 oz more that a pound below their birth weight.  We then took them to a lactation specialists, which was so helpful.  We learned that even though our babies were considered full term, they were not eating like full term babies and that they were burning more calories trying to nurse than they were getting in food.

The next two weeks were so hard.  I would nurse them for five min on each side, then feed them a bottle, and then pump. They needed to be fed every 3 hours, even throughout the night. By the time we changed them and fed them it would take up to an hour and a half, so needless to say no one was getting any sleep.  Luckily my amazing Mom came and helped out everyday while was Stuart was at work.  I at least got to take naps every couple of days, but I don't know how Stu could even function at work.
After two weeks the girls started gaining weight back and were almost to their birth weight.  So then we decided to ween them off the formula, and just nurse.  We then did this again for a week and took them back to the lactation specialists.  It was so heartbreaking to realize yet again that they were loosing more weight, and were almost back to where we started.  I was then faced with one of the hardest choices I have had to make.  I needed to either continue with the routine we were doing with the supplementing and nursing, or just feed them only formula.  I struggled so much with this decision since I totally believe that breast milk is the best thing, but they were not thriving, I was a wreck, I felt so helpless that I could not provide the one thing my babies needed, and with the time it took to feed them I physically could not take care of them and MacRae by myself.

After a lot of praying and talking with Stu, we both decided that just doing formula only was the best option for us and our children.  The moment that I made this decision I totally felt at peace, and was so much more confident that I could have the strength and energy to take care of myself and my family.  Once they started on a very strict schedule of feedings they finally started to gain the weight back.

This month was not just hard it was very fun to have Stu home for 2 weeks straight, and have so much time to get to know our sweet little angles.

Nap time With Daddy

Peyton 1 Month Old

Teagan 1 Month

 Sleeping Together.  They always have to be nose to nose and touching eachothers skin, or they would not go to sleep.

Their Proud Brother

Holding Hands

I cannot get over how tiny they are.

Cuddling With Mom

It is amazing how talented you become to hold to babies while wiping a bum.